“We have many ideas about how we should be and how the world should be, yet none of these is the way things are. Human life is a tainted glory – messy, paradoxical, filled with contradictions. The cloak of the world is woven with magnificence and limitation, triumph and disappointment, loss and eternal re-creation. To seek some ideal of perfection puts us in conflict with the world.”
I find myself writing a lot about what psychologist Jack Kornfield calls the elegance of imperfection. This notion appears to be an oxymoron, a contradiction, a befuddling concept like attributing gracefulness to someone who stumbles. But I’m convinced that there is wisdom in embracing imperfection as the way of all the earth.
That being said, I wonder why I, and perhaps you, too, continue to strive for ideals that are beyond reach? Our bodies betray us, people let us down, life rains on our parade in a thousand ways; why do we set ourselves up for failure by attempting to wrestle ourselves and the world into submission, into being the way we want them to be?
Predictably futile as our efforts may be, I believe we are wired to strive for perfection because we are spiritual beings in search of flawlessness. It may sound self serving, but we are made to have it all, to have our cake and eat it too, to have the best of both worlds. Bliss is our birthright – we are destined for glory, tainted or otherwise. The truth of this perspective notwithstanding, when we attempt to both have that cake and eat it, we detract from the elegance of our own and life’s imperfection.
How then are we to maneuver this conundrum, how can we live as spiritual beings in a messy world? I believe that detachment from the ideal of perfection makes it possible to both affirm our spiritual longings and to live without their fulfillment. Being detached does not mean that we cease to care about how life unfolds, but that we hold our ideas and ideals lightly so that when they do not come to pass, we are less likely to live “in conflict with the world.”
Attuned to Soul 
This definitely speaks to me. It may be one of those lessons that becomes much more relevant with age, or perhaps in some things we are slow learners. This reminded me of a Blessing by one of my favorite authors, speakers, podcasters: Kathe Bowler. Thank you for your insight and inspiration! Rudy
Blessed are we, living in this small space, in these bodies we now inhabit,
Within the walls of circumstance, in these short years and finite strength
With eyes that only see so far.
We are fragile contingent beings.
Yet blessed are we, recognizing that it is our limits as well as our gifts
That can shape the natural contours of what is possible,
That guides us to what is ours to do.
Blessed are we when it is not our greatness that speaks,
But our littleness.
For it is our vulnerability that tells the truest story,
The place where mutual connection is possible,
Where competition ends and community begins.
There is no cure for being human,
But for each other…we are all good medicine.
Kate Bowler: A Blessing and a Curse for Being Human
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Thanks, Rudy, a beautiful poem
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